Louanne Ward Matchmaking: Are you dating a narcissist?

Louanne Ward, a certified master matchmaker with two decades of experience, has listed the red flags of dating a narcissist in the early stages of a relationship. Narcissistic personality disorder is a psychiatric condition marked by grandiosity, excessive need for attention and admiration, and an inability to empathize. The symptoms of narcissism include an inflated self-esteem, an insatiable desire for praise, and a conviction that they are exceptional in some way. Narcissistic partners have a four-stage pattern of abuse in a relationship: idealization, devaluation, discarding, and hoovering.

Men with narcissistic traits frequently believe they have the right to be in charge, admired and showered with praise, and have difficulty empathizing with the emotions of those around them. Narcissistic males have a tendency to overstate their abilities, accomplishments and constantly seek approval and praise from others around them. Women with narcissistic personality disorders have a preoccupation with looking their best at all times, which means they are constantly thinking about how to improve their appearance. They may have a tendency to speak over others, interrupt them, and ignore their opinions. 

Louanne warns that victims of narcissistic partners may experience confusion, emotional abuse, and have their sense of self-worth destroyed. It is difficult to recognize narcissistic traits in the early stages of a relationship, as lovers are on their best behavior to win them over. As the relationship develops, narcissistic partners begin to criticize and devalue their partner, leading to confusion and emotional abuse. Narcissistic partners frequently switch behaviors between idealization, devaluation, discarding, and hoovering, which can lead to their partner being confused, hurt and broken.

Louanne suggested that the first sign of spotting a narcissistic partner is to notice the pattern of abuse. If potential victims have experienced a whirlwind romance that turned toxic, they will have seen the early warning signs. People can avoid falling in love with a narcissist by looking out for patterns of abuse and recognizing the characteristics of a narcissistic person. Although not all individuals who have narcissistic traits exhibit these behaviors, understanding them can help address the specific challenges that each gender might face when dealing with this personality disorder. Anyone who needs support in a dangerous, violent, abusive or potentially abusive situation can contact the National Sexual Assault, Family & Domestic Violence Counselling Line for free and confidential telephone and online services by calling 1800RESPECT, or 1800 737 732, 24/7.



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